im drinking this country out of the recession.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
