It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO