Who wears a wallet chain?!
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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