I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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