Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.