I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize