we made out on top of his cat.
Fuck appropriateness.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
