her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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