question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
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