Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
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But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something