im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
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