i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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