Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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