it wasn't lemon gatorade
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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