Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize