her vagine was all disorganized.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
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I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
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He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.