I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
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