I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize