You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
