Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops