wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club