I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
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At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
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You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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