Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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