it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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