i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
