my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
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