why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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