dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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