y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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