Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I just gargled with NyQuil
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
