things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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