i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize