redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
