I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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