apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
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