I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
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I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
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I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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