i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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