they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Randomize
