And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
false alarm, still single
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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