I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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