I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
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Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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