we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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