Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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