So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
