I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Randomize