he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
