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You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Randomize
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