He kissed a someone with a penis
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation