who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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