I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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