he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
The best revenge is premature balding
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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