Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered